Posts Tagged ‘wishes’

For those that don’t know – I have a child that has gone through depression, attempted suicide, told he was Bi-Polar – yadda yadda.  He leads a rough life at times.  But he’s not alone.  There are family members that each have to deal with their portion of his difficulties – mom, brothers, sister… etc.  We all deal with it in ways that are perfect for each of us.

We aren’t alone either, there are many many kids and their families that go through tough spots in life.  The families are sometimes the only ones standing strong for these kids because we know their true beauty and goodness inside.  Others, we find, steer clear because they don’t know how to deal with it.

I am asking that everyone Stumble this post if you do enjoy it – it is the wish of the teen that wrote this that others that may be in the same situation get some reality that they aren’t alone!

The following is a wonderful (tear jerker for me) poem that a teen wrote about his own experience as a brother (a twin brother no less) of a young man that is going through something very close to what my Stephen endures.

The following was given to many just to read, and those that could find themselves in his shoes have been praising the writing.  If you wouldn’t mind getting this out there for this young man (I will not name him unless his mother approves).  He wants others to know they aren’t alone!

It is okay to copy this to give to others, but you cannot copy and use it as your own.  Simply refer back to this post as the originator and that is fine.  Do not publish this unless you receive permission (just email me, I will ask the mother and the boy for you) through this site.

Again, please Stumble this or whatever way you can if you enjoy it.  This deserves to find it’s way to those that will benefit.

You Have To Be His Brother To Understand

What is it like to feel anger, broken-heartedness, and love at the same time?
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to watch your brother constantly hurt your mom,
And feel no remorse,
Because he hardly understands what he’s doing at the time?
what is it like to have to sit there, and remain silent,
All while you witness both people suffering?
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to see someone close to you,
Having already flown as high as they can get
Or so it seems?
Professionals say he can’t go any further,
But you pray to God he can.
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to witness someone you love,
Hurt to the point of tears because he feels he can’t make it?
What is it like to feel so much pain your body, heart, and mind,
Can hardly take it because you see your own brother’s life in shambles?
What is it like to hear people call your brother stupid?
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to be the privileged brother,
Yet you watch his life spiral downward,
All as teachers have given up on him,
Saying he won’t amount to anything in this world,
Because he has trouble reading?
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to have many true friends,
But your brother has next to none,
So he feels alone, even though you share yours,
But he knows that, he knows they’re yours,
It kills you because it’s killing him?
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to love your brother,
With such a sense of protecting him because of his delicacy,
That your friends call you wrong because, you get angered at the
Slightest thing anyone says about your brother, at the times when
People laugh at him, you want to punch people’s lights out?
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to see him depressed as he’s cycling through meds,
And most psychiatrists can’t help him because
they refuse to push aside their pride,
and so you watch him suffer because of their idiotic mistakes,
and it makes you so sad to see this situation unfold before your eyes?
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to have the desire to tell him he’ll be o.k.,
He’ll make it no matter what anyone tells him,
He’ll spread his wings and fly much higher than anyone ever anticipated,
He’s always loved and prayed for by many people,
Yet you can’t muster up the courage to tell him because you’re afraid he’ll reject this statement of love?
You have to be his brother to understand.

What is it like to feel anger, broken-heartedness, and love at the same time?
You have to be his brother to understand.

First, a huge amount of gratitude to those that have commented, emailed and given their love and support in the times I’ve had in the last week.

I have had Stephen read the comments and he teared up.  He’s 16 but can be touched by kind hearts and beautiful words.  Thank you.

He is starting his own blog, and I’ll link here when he’s got it a bit under control.

Second, if there is anyone else out there that is empathic at all – I ask you this – how heavy are you feeling now?

Those reading may not believe in what I do, and that’s a blessing because varied views are beautiful and learning experiences for us all!

Let me tell you where I’m at right this moment as a 40 year old lady, living in the U.S. on this planet Earth in this Solar System and a part of the Universe:

I’m fighting to keep my world full of light, and love and stillness.

Although I’ve dealt with emotional ups and downs this last week – I can tell you that isn’t all that is creating a difficult situation in my spirit.

In the U.S. we have so many crisis’s right now.  From the election, to the financial “Wholly Heck”, to the day to day issues of homelessness, abuse and suffering.

In the World we have suffering, war, and hate.

On Earth we have a general tone of “oh well, someone will fix it later”.

*We* does not mean each individual by the way, there are many doing what they can in each instance.  But not the whole.

Mahatma Ghandi has a quote I attempt to live my life by every day and I do fall short most days unfortunately:

Be the change you want to see in the world.

That doesn’t mean look to someone to change it.  It does truly mean for you to be the change you wish for.  It starts with each of us.

With that said, there isn’t many American’s right now that aren’t having great angst and fear around this election.  Both the Obama side and the McCain side of voters actually FEAR the other getting into office.  Why?  It’s because of our media and mis-information being thrown at you. These two are men.  Humans like us.  They will each do the best they can to assist this country.  Neither is as bad as each side paints them to be.

I can say I’ve personally seen things that make me question the integrity and sincerity of both sides.  Enough to make me wonder who to “write in” on the ballot.  Then I catch myself.

Folks, either candidate will be perfect.

If that statement jolts you from the inside and you want to SCREAM “it’s not so” – then I urge you to look inside and ask yourself what your true fear is.  Take a deep look at what you fear and work on that.  Yourself.

Whoever gets elected is going to have a tough year ahead of them.  It’s just where we are at right now.

I get that lately – many folks are going to need therapy in heavy doses after this election.

It will all be okay.

It will all just *be* and that is perfect.

Please get yourself to a place of calmness, stillness and light if you are currently in fear, stressed or generally off balance.  At the very least, if you are feeling this way – take a look at it.

It feels to me that the world is going faster and faster and folks are attempting to move away from it, not with it.

It will all be okay… really.  It will be perfect.

Love and Light to everyone that reads this.  You are loved.

Monica

Oh pooh! I don’t remember who had this up!

Jeeze, there I go clickin’ to quick!

Anywho… thanks to whomever found this fun thing!  Hugs and Love at ya!

So, here’s my contribution to a little fun stuff…. A OK?

You Are an “A-OK”

Your life philosophy can be summed up as, “Whatever will be, will be.” Your greatest wish is to live each day a little better than the next. You are naturally calm and stable. Some people would call you a rock. You feel one with the world. You are a spiritual person, though no one who knows you would guess it.

I’m off to a client’s and wanted to say a quick hello.

Here he is!  It took me almost 10 mins to just write this… ’cause he’s teeeeeething and chewing on everything.  LOL  Oh lordy… but he’s getting there!  Or not…  I just have to puppy proof my home. Which btw I thought I did… NOPE!

So…. Here’s some pics.  Wish us luck!  I’ll write more but the little guy gets to have his walk…

There are more pics on the Flickr site (link to the left).

Whoot! 

Just a moment to tell you how beautiful it is and to share a pic of sun for those that may not have it. 

Someone sent this picture to me and it made me smile. 

I thought I’d give it to you. 

I wish I knew who took it, I could give them proper credit.

Love and Plenty of Sunshine Light,

With Warm Thoughts and Wishes

For all of you!

I would SO love to run in this field.

As some may know my father-in-law passed away this past October.  Today is his 70th birthday and I wanted to write a moment on this.

Ofcourse we miss him.  It still hurts. 

But, I sang Happy Birthday to him in my car today and smiled as I just knew he was having "cake" somewhere smiling back at us.

He’s such a beautiful spirit… and we can always wish him Happy Birthday.  I just know he hears us and it makes him smile.

Happy Birthday dear Harold.  Hugs and smooches.  Love your honorary daughter.

For me, turning 40 is absolutely beautiful… it’s

• heavenly
• exciting
• euphoric
• scary
• vibrant
• engaging

without a doubt, a year I’ve looked forward to… since I was very young.  

I wish I could express how absolutely jubilant I feel. 

You Are an Orange Rose

You represent desire and enthusiasm Your vibe: Sexy yet familiar Falling in love with you: happens instantly – it’s a fast ride

Today is a reflection day.  I found I was holding in so many feelings lately, that I about exploded.  With my father-in-law passing away, I thought I could be strong and that because I knew he was in a beautiful spiritual place now, I would feel okay.  But, it seems I’m like everyone when they lose someone close – I have a grieving period. 

It’s Okay To Greive – in fact, I personally believe for your spiritual health, it’s simply a must

Someone said something that was quite hurtful, and I was very upset.  Then, I looked back on it and realized… it’s okay.  I forgive very easily because I really love so much.  To be spiteful is actually a poison to a person.  Negative energy isn’t allowed in my life, it’s diffused very quickly.  That’s all new to me and I’m learning how to do just that…   Forgiveness is a beautiful and a very cleansing response to any issue really.  Or at least, I’m learning.  To that person, I simply send love and light because it’s just what they need.  Everyone deserves love.

Everyone Deserves Love

Last night I broke down alot.  I feel better today but a bit *hung over* from crying so much.

It’s Healthy To Cry

What works for me?  Taking pictures does… today it did.  Blogging does as well!  And reading blogs from all of you, well… that just puts a day into a perfect place.  Not to mention my beautiful family.

I’ll share with you my journal for today with photos and a bit of what I was thinking as I took each of them.  If it gets too boring, go play frogger on the “Fun Stuff” page!  I’m all about giggles ya know.  Fer cryin’ out loud! 

Here’s my photo journal for the day…

I mentioned a few posts ago that I have new grass.  Due to the puppy we got, the wires to the sprinkler system were dug up and chewed through and well… the puppy just destroyed it.  Because my husband is so truly kind and loving to me, he got us a brand new lawn… and it’s green, and it’s absolutely beautiful.  No more dirt and tufts of weeds, I have my beautiful lawn back. 

That gazebo you see is another of my enjoyments.  My husband and I use the jacuzzi alot!  The top of the gazebo has a wonderful green metal roof.  The sounds of rain on the roof, the feeling of the cold air around you, and the warmth of the 102 degree gurgling jacuzzi… well, it’s just a slice of my heaven.  I’m thankful.

Ofcourse, there are frogs in them thar hills.  If you look up on the gazebo, there are three frogs in a stepping stone that I’ve hung… they are absolutely the best.

This is just one of the times I’ve looked to the sky and gotten the feeling of wonder.  When I’m in the yard, I always look up.  The sky to me is like a slideshow of random wonder.  It’s always ever changing, and never anything less than awe inspiring.  At least, if you look at it through the eyes of a child.  That, I’ve been learning to do more and more as well.  Thanks to Harold ~ he suggested to look at things like you were a child.  It’s an interesting perspective.

Our puppy.  Daniel and I have four children between the two of us.  Both of us wonder what a baby from the both of us would look like, be like… but we are not going to have a child.  After his son was born, he didn’t want another.  After I hit 30, you couldn’t have paid me to go through all of that again.  We are happy to have Sammy – the fur-child.  He doesn’t look like us, doesn’t talk… but BOY does he love us.

Since we’ve had such a tough few months, I’ve noticed something about Sammy that not every dog has… he’s highly responsive to emotions.  In example, I was crying last night and he pushed his head into my arms and just looked up at me with the compassion I would only think could be found in a human.  I’m wrong, ofcourse, but he just seemed to *know*.  He wouldn’t leave my side until I felt better.  Then he moved to the floor by me and laid down, not taking an eye off of me.

Sammy may look ferocious to our neighbors and those that have made the mistake of attempting to get into the yard ~ but his heart is of gold, and he is extremely protective.  He’s a true gift.

Just watch the teeth.  Oh, and when he stands fully erect (with the help of placing his paws on your shoulders) – he looks my husband straight in the eye.  5′10″ I believe.   

As I was about done with my photo thoughts, I walked inside and looked around our house.  It feels so wonderful.  So loving.  Even the refrigerator has love on it:

These beauties are my niece Megan, and her beautiful momma Wendy.  The bear ‘o magnet is from a cruise I was lucky enough to take to Alaska in 2003.  Another bit of thankfulness.

Thank you for sharing in my thoughts for the day.  I truly wish you love and light and remember to look at things through the eyes of a child. 

Love and Light,

Monica Ford