Posts Tagged ‘medications’

While my handsome boy is in the hospital getting some much needed assistance, I’m left with the thought of – “What happens when he comes home?”  Afterall, it sure doesn’t seem safe to me for him to be here at the house alone.

So a friend referred me to a company that places in home caregivers.  Normally, this is for an invalid elder parent or someone that just got done with surgery.  But, my little boy deserves to have some assistance at home.  I deserve to have some piece of mind.

I meet with them on Tuesday to see if there is a fit somewhere.  The person will need to be able to handle a 6′1″ 250lb kid (185.42 cm | 113.40 kilo) if he has a psychotic episode, they will need to understand bi-polar and psychosis disorder.  They’ll need to be okay with a big (kinda) German Shephard.  They’ll also need to be here from 6 AM to 6 PM.  Where do you find someone like that?

I’m sure there is something we can do.  I made it clear to the doctors he cannot come home until we have a safe plan in place.

Speaking of doctors.  Let me tell you a bit about what I go through with these folks.

First, they always like to say the reason he’s going through this is something YOU are doing wrong.  Now, at first – I listened to that and thought I surely must be a horrible parent.  Then, the more I thought about it the more I figured out they truly don’t know what the issue is and the easiest way to put blame somewhere is on the parent.  Now, I’m quite strong minded and strong willed.  Although in the beginning I took everything to heart and beat myself up for it, the more I got into this the more I realized the docs didn’t know as much as they SOUND like they do.

Let me give you an example of this.  His psychiatrist, his therapist and his OTHER doctor all recommended he go on this Independent Study High School Program.  My initial reaction was “You have got to be kidding!  You want a child that is depressed to stay home all day with not interaction with society?  It will make him more depressed!”  Yes, I said just that.  Their response?  “No, this is the best thing for him.  He cannot handle regular high school.”  With that, he was switched to the Independent program against my better judgement.  The psychiatrist that is treating him in the hospital chastised me for putting him into a program with this.  Basically asking what I was thinking, and that because he was depressed placing him in this situation just worsened it.  I let her have it with all the momma guns I have:

“You people are completely guessing at crap aren’t you?”  ” I put my child there because folks that have the SAME degree as you said it was the best for him while I argued it wasn’t!”  “You people are guessing!”

They are you know.  Mind you, they do know alot more than me.  But when it comes to my child – I’ve learned a year and a half later – I KNOW MORE!

I really ripped into that doctor.  They were saying it was the environment that was causing this.  Yeah, okay – you are right – a loving home is a horrid thing to live in.  I give up.

The doctors will always tell you that you are doing something wrong.

I ended that discussion saying that I’ve figured them out, they know nothing – they are guessing and that from now on they will listen to me.

::sigh::

They want a fight?  I’ll give them one. This is my baby – he’s struggling like there is no tomorrow and I’ll be d*mned if I allow these doctors to continue to play guessing games with my child’s life.

They get to get to the bottom line.  What is the issue?  Obviously the medication doesn’t work.  Not any of them.  They work for a bit then he crashes hard.  Argh.

Okay, I’m done venting about the docs for a moment.  But I get to go to see them tonight and I’ll be fighting again if that’s what it takes.

Now – I need to find Mary Poppins on steroids.

Love and Light,

Mon

After a week of pure heck, my son is getting released!

Yeah!

The doc just called and said the new medications are working and blood tests are good.  Stephen hasn’t seen the “Shadow” figure since last week and will be released into momma’s care tomorrow.

Can I get a whoot!?

Lordy what a week.

When was the last time you had to visit someone in a hospital that took someone escorting you through a maze of hallways, through 3 locked MASSIVE doors, cameras and warnings of AWOL patients with alarms placed in every corridor.

Oh boy what a ride.

Poor kid.

What’s interesting to me is that there are children as young as 5 in this hospital.  5 Years old!  5!?  Mind you, they are separated out – adolescents, adults and little ones.  Different areas of the hospital.  Can you imagine?  5?!

By the way, I have a real issue with medication.  I feel as though medicating someone takes away from who they truly are inside.  But there are those that live well on the medicine, so there is a good to it.  I just really get that if you are anything outside the norm – I feel like they label you and give you meds instead of getting to the root of the issue.  Ofcourse, they say it’s a chemical imbalance… oh, I digress.  I’m not a doc.

I’m so happy!

Ofcourse he’s comin’ home to finals week……. argh